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Meet The Staff

Micah Bleich
Editor, Webmaster, Staff Writer
Head Nerd in charge of Nerdery

Mercedes Moore
Staff Writer
Director of Sexy Attitude

C.J.
Staff Writer, Reporter
Executive Fan Boy

K.T.
Staff Writer, Music afficianado
Senior Asian Female

Jack Belmont
Staff Writer, Reporter
Director of Snarky Comments

Melissa J. Corley
Staff Writer
Chief Hype and Innuendo Officer

Kourtnie
Staff Writer
Senior WoW Correspondent and Imagineer

Zach Shephard
Guest Contributor

How can I pick up more women?

February 10, 2008 by myka

About Mercedes and this column:
So this traipse into column-self-worship/thinly-veiled-right-to-brag
has been a long time coming. I've only been in existence for 25 years
(and sleeping around/making out for about 11 of them) so I am sure many
of you are wondering what makes me so qualified to be giving anyone

Your rating: None Average: 7.3 (3 votes)
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How NOT to get a Wii

February 10, 2008 by myka

"I'll just wait until after the holiday rush, then there will be plenty of Wiis available."
Or so I told myself a few months ago, opting not to buy a Wii bundle deal. I'm not spending an extra $20 for a memory card, I'll just wait a week or two and pickup a console at retail with no strings attached..."

It'll be easy I thought...

...

...

...

Nice move dip shit.

Your rating: None Average: 5.5 (4 votes)
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Explore The Galaxy, Mario Style

January 31, 2008 by myka

SCORE: 9.5 out of 10.0.
[Worth Living For] (Zero Apathy)

 

The presentation is top notch with
graphics that put the Wii to work and an almost fully orchestrated soundtrack.
The look and design make this the best thing since super Mario 64, they can
never get back the "OMG its 3d" effect from 64 but this game gets damn
close.

Your rating: None Average: 5 (2 votes)
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Games Gone Wrong: Rockstar's Candy Land Extreme

January 24, 2008 by myka

Yet another game gone tragically wrong.

Candy Land Extreme

Your rating: None Average: 6 (1 vote)

A 'New' Adventure With Mario

December 10, 2007 by CaptainDuh

We here at Two Bit News aren’t always the most prompt game reviewers. Our annual budget of $20.15 is usually spent on pizza instead of buying the latest releases, so sometimes we might let a game go by for a couple months before we can review it. But we care about our reader and want to make sure he (or she) is informed of everything that’s going on in the gaming world, even if the news is a little late, and that is why the editor told me, “Who the hell are you? Get me some coffee! I’ve got a bad [censored]ing hang over.”
Your rating: None Average: 6 (2 votes)
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Games Gone Wrong

Games Gone Wrong: Marvel Ultimate Appliance
February, 12, 2009
Games Gone Wrong: Killzone 2: Layoffs
January, 29, 2009

Comic

Great Moments In Gaming - ESRB
February, 8, 2009

Horoscopes

Don't Be An Idiot

AQUARIUS
January 20-February 18
Recheck your credit card balance -- if you're close to the limit, now is the time to settle up. There are lots of ways to manage debt like shaking trees and selling the apples that fall out. If you didn't understand this piece of advice, it's because you don't play Animal Crossing, and therefore, are not a complete idiot. Congratulations.

Features

Top Ten Things You Can Learn By Watching Red Vs. Blue

February 9, 2009 by SSXallnight

Any gamer worth his snuff is familiar with Red Vs. Blue, but not a lot of people realize the educational value of the Halo-based machinima. If you're one of the unfortunates who isn't cool enough to know about the hilarious internet series; here is a list of things you would know if you didn't spend so much time doing your homework or actually showing up on time to your job.

Your rating: None Average: 8 (1 vote)

5 Steps To Become A Pretentious Asshole

November 29, 2008 by myka

Pretentious Bunny

Sometimes just knowing something isn't enough. To truly appreciate knowledge, one must draw attention mercilessly to themselves. So, Two Bit News is happy to present this top list to sounding like a pretentious asshole, or guide if you prefer deriving from the latin word meaning "full of information" (more on this later!).

Your rating: None Average: 9 (1 vote)

Top 7 things to do while waiting for a Playstation 3 game install

June 19, 2008 by myka

Snake is bored waiting for MGS4 install

Being a Playstation 3 owner you're going to have a little bit of free time with those mandatory installs for games like Devil May Cry 4 and Metal Gear Solid 4 and any other games with 4 in it. Here are the top 7 ways for you to kill some time.

Your rating: None Average: 4.5 (2 votes)